Giving Birth to a Book (and Post-Pub Depression)

At the release party for my new book last week, I told the audience that publishing a book was like giving birth. I felt like I was justified in saying that because I've given birth to actual children twice, so I know what the "real thing" is like. The short explanation is that there's a huge sense of relief and joy and excitement when the book first comes out, but as the excitement wanes, you start to think, I'm never doing that again! I've done my duty in procreating and one child is plenty. But just like with kids, something called "pregnancy amnesia" starts to set in about a year after pub date (a.k.a. birth). You forget about the deadlines, the sleepless nights, the aches and pains from sitting in a chair for too long, and the tedium of endless edits and revisions. After a while, you start thinking, Hmmm...maybe it's time to start writing another book... (For the record, the human child factory is closed.)

Most people know it's hard to get published. I have been incredibly blessed to have two books in print with a major New York publisher, including a Spanish translation purchased by another major publisher. But there's this notion among many non-writers that published authors have some semblance of celebrity and wealth, and don't know much about what real life is like for many of us (Hint: it usually does NOT involve wealth). Even more mysterious is the reality that comes after a book is published for a lot of authors--what I'm starting to call "post-pub depression."

For most, I imagine it's not a real depression, but more of a serious letdown. I can only use myself as a personal example, but I've read enough author blogs to know I'm not alone. I had a serious spike in pre-orders just before Border Insecurity came out, thanks to a big media push by Breitbart News and some local media outlets here in Tucson. We sold 42 copies at the book release party (which means half the people in attendance bought a copy there), and I did three media interviews the day of the launch to push sales up that first week. I expected my Amazon rank to shoot up at least into the tens of thousands, if not the single thousands (it hit around #6,700 the day before its release), and it did...but it didn't stay there for as long as I had hoped.

While Amazon book rankings aren't all they're cracked up to be (nobody really knows the algorithm for how the rank relates to actual purchases), they're all we helpless authors have to go by to determine if people are buying our books. There are plenty of other outlets, like the Barnes & Noble website that also ranks books, but no one has the volume that Amazon does. My frustration is starting to build because I'm doing a TON of media, I'm much more well-known than I was when Cartel was published, and the initial reviews for Border Insecurity were outstanding. How audacious am I to wonder why hundreds of thousands of people all worried about our borders aren't running out to buy this book???

I ask that tongue-in-cheek of course, but it's very easy to build up your own work in your mind, especially when you have a lot of people telling you how awesome your book is. I have to keep reminding myself that for someone in a niche market like me, book sales are a marathon and not a sprint. Cartel didn't exactly sell a million copies right out of the gate. But here we are, 2 ½ years after it was originally published in hardcover, and sales are just as strong as they were right after pub date. Of course it's getting a big bump from Border Insecurity sales, but Cartel sales never really dropped off because the subject matter--while outdated in some places--is still completely relevant today.

So even though it's only been a week since my new book's publication, I'm working hard to fight off that post-pub depression I can feel just around the corner. Several times a day I'm checking Amazon ranks, and both anticipating and dreading how many stars the first review will garner--and fretting that the first review still hasn't come in. Can't people read a book in less than a week??? (Again, tongue-in-cheek.) I've had one amazing review from a very conservative media outlet and two mostly positive (but not glowing) reviews (here and here) from very liberal newspapers, and while I should be over the moon that my book is living up to its non-partisan characterizations, I'm not satisfied. I was crushed when my first Goodreads review came in at 3 out of 5 stars, even though the reader was only displeased that the book wasn't emotional enough for her; she really loved all the information and found it easy to read and interesting.

And more media push is coming. I was in Los Angeles yesterday to tape an episode of The Tavis Smiley Show, which will air on May 1st. I taped a show for the local PBS affiliate tonight for airing twice this weekend here in Tucson and in Phoenix, and I'm doing Al Jazeera America live tomorrow night. More media appearances will come, and I have a border conference to attend in late May that will likely garner more readers. I just have to learn to do something I've always sucked at: Give it time.

This is one of those let-it-go moments that we control freaks have such a hard time with. I can do my absolute best during interviews and bust my hump to get the word out about the book through friends, networking, and social media. But ultimately, my book's fate isn't up to me; it's up to millions of faceless strangers who may or may not buy it and may or may not understand or agree with my message. I'm going to try as best as I can to thank God for blessing me with this talent, for the incredible opportunity to share my message with anyone in this country (and several other countries) who wants to read it, and for the ability to contribute to humanity's body of knowledge. And if you want to read my book, you can buy it here :).